Why??

This is my pet peeve; telling me you don’t have to use the bathroom when asked point blank and then five minutes later announcing you have reached emergency bathroom status. Both boys were in the truck and we were on our way to Tae Kwon Do. We were running late and Full Speed exclaims “I really have to pee!”

Like a fool I start to argue with him (meaning why reason with someone who is five years old and who is just doing their best at existence?). “Why didn’t you say you had to go when we were in your class not FIVE minutes ago? Why did you wait until I have you both buckled in to tell me you had to go? Did your need to pee really increase that much from there to here? Did it? DID IT?”

Full Speed looks confused and highly uncomfortable by my angry questioning. I get a grip and stop asking. I make a snap decision. My decided upon plan could go flawlessly or let’s just say there would be a ‘contaminated area’ in the back of my truck, we’d have to skip Tae Kwon Do and spend the rest of our evening sanitizing Full Speed and his car seat. I hop in the front seat and for me (which isn’t very), drive aggressively the two minutes to Tae Kwon Do. I pull up to the studio, heave the bag of all their stuff over my shoulder, grab the boys and we race at top speed (which is more like speed walking in a rickety fashion) and manage to get Full Speed to the bathroom without incident (he also thankfully did not lock himself in there).

No matter how many questions I ask in the hopes of changing what is unchangeable, the answer remains the same; boys will be boys and their Mom will drink cocktails.

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