children, family, happiness, humor, kids, motherhood, parenting

The Happy Grocery Story

Full Speed’s expression here, as T.Puzzle attempts to cause him bodily harm, aptly captures how I felt physically last week.

I haven’t been feeling up to par for a while now.  Initially, I tried to stay very positive about the whole situation.  After Mad Dog travelled for work and T.Puzzle came down with the same symptoms, my positivity started to slip away.  No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t magically manifest a stocked refrigerator through happy visualization.  At some point, I had to break down and go to the grocery.  I opted to take the boys with me because obviously whatever virus I had, it clearly was damaging the reasoning parts of my muddled brain.

Before we entered the grocery, I croaked out my usual round of threats to get the boys to behave.  Once we were in the store, I honestly didn’t care what they did.   Naturally, there was a lot of pretend fire arm action and we fell deeply under enemy fire somewhere in the cereal aisle. For the most part, we managed to get through the store unscathed.  That is, until we neared the bread section.  As we turned the corner, Full Speed and T.Puzzle pushed the cart into a metal display stand of antibacterial wipes.  It sounded a lot worse than it actually was.  The crash of the cart sent a shockwave down the aisle and about 17 Moms jumped out of their skins.  I could see the panic on their faces as they turned to their own carts and quickly did a roll call to make sure all their children and corresponding limbs were accounted for.

“My bad!” I squeaked through my throbbing throat.  “No worries everyone, it’s only my crazy kids, not yours.”

The relief was palpable.  I cut our losses and we headed straight to the check-out.  So what if I forgot to get milk?  At least the dairy case that housed the milk remained safely intact to see another day.

See?  Look how positive I am.

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