children, mommyhood, rock and a hard place

Oh, Stupid Day!

I had every intent of writing a hilarious and detailed account of the boys adventures from yesterday. However, I was sidetracked because Mad Dog’s car, which I am driving today, decided to quit working while it was parked at the Super Target loaded to the gills with groceries and goods.

Tomorrow, I will give you all the deets on a day that seems to get more stupid as it proceeds. On the plus side, Mad Dog is an amazingly cool problem-solver, I had fun with T.Puzzle in the Target café’ and my sister, Skee, comes in for a visit. The only way is up!

children, mommyhood, rock and a hard place, self-image/self-acceptance

Hair Trouble

I saw ‘The Color Purple’ at the theater last night. It was a girls’ night by all means. My sister-in-law and mother-in-law had purchased a series of musical theater tickets for my birthday and this was the first show. We managed to arrive in enough time to enjoy an excellent dinner at the Omni Hotel and still get to our seats. It was glorious to sit back, enjoy a glass of wine, good conversation with adults and a child-free evening.

We weren’t sure what to expect with the show. We knew the book and movie were pretty intense and weren’t sure how that would play out on a musical stage. It was a pleasant and entertaining surprise. The level of talent was very good and there was much more humor in it than we anticipated.

Once I had returned home and tucked myself in for the night, Full Speed came into our bedroom sometime in the early morning hours. Mad Dog and I sent him hastily back to his room. He was hyper-emotional about this which is completely out of character. In the morning, he looked peaked, had a temp and had no appetite to speak of. Looks like I was going to have company for the day.

Mad Dog escorted a very unwilling T.Puzzle to school (apparently he screamed and cried the whole ride over there) and I was faced with the task of keeping Full Speed hydrated and happy.

Soon we are alone and he looks up at me with the saddest, puppy dog eyes and says, “Why aren’t you coming to my Thanksgiving Feast on Friday?”

I know, I know, I seem like a highly inconsiderate parent. There is more to the story. Way back in mid-October I called my salon and set up hair appointments for the remainder of the year as it gets booked solid with the approaching holidays. Of course when I made the appointment for November, I was unaware of the impending feast at Full Speed’s school. I figured it was no big deal to miss. I had attended his Halloween luncheon with Mad Dog and only three other parents had shown up. Therefore, I signed up to bring in a fruit tray (ordered from the grocery of course) and thought nothing of it.

Yesterday at school as I had cleaned out Full Speed’s ‘mailbox’, I came across a Thanksgiving Feast reminder paper. It said ‘please note that we have 36 people attending Friday’s feast’. I did the math. Full Speed has nineteen kids in his class. That means almost every, single kid will have a parent present.

Guess who is skipping the salon and will have bad hair for the holidays? This year I will be thankful that my kids love me for who I am and not what I look like. Otherwise, I would be in serious trouble.

children, mommyhood, rock and a hard place

Hot Bananas

You know in life that sometimes you have to pick your battles. Sometimes you’ll let your two year old change into an orange Lightning McQueen t-shirt when you had already placed a perfectly acceptable navy blue Lightning McQueen one on him. In life, you aren’t going to win them all.

When Mad Dog originally wanted to take our then two and a half year old Full Speed to see the first Transformers movie, I resisted. It seemed too violent and full of innuendo for me to think it was a good fit for Full Speed.  After a lot of persistence on Mad Dog’s part I relented. You know pick your battles and all.

So of course when the second Transformers movie came out you know who and who were first in line. Fine. At least I didn’t have to go.

Now this cinematic wonder is out on DVD. We own it. Of course.

Full Speed has adjusted fairly well to seeing the violent action. He doesn’t have scary nightmares and honestly, he is exactly as hyper as he was before (off the charts).

Well, my opinion of the movie’s effect may have shifted slightly this morning. I was eating breakfast with my adorable boys. We had a lengthy discussion about omnivores vs. herbivores (Full Speed loves dinosaurs).  T.Puzzle sang ‘Hakuna Matata’ and I announced that everyone who was eating at the table were bananavores. They thought that was giggly silly. I even belted out a few bars of ‘Hakuna Matata’ myself.

Full Speed looks at me and says, “You’re hot, but not too bright.” He means it as a way to compliment my singing but I don’t find this very complimentary. I’m speechless in fact. It didn’t feel like a very proud parenting moment either.

In the second Transformers movie there is a point when an evil robot thing refers to Megan Fox’s character in the same way. In that context it seems fitting. At home eating breakfast with my two boys it does not.

I asked Full Speed to not say that again and let it go at that. I didn’t make a big deal about it because I wasn’t sure where to begin. I would have to define ‘hotness’ and wasn’t sure how to make the term relatable to a five year old. Then, I would have to go off into the feminist juncture about never insulting a woman’s intelligence or evaluating her based primarily on her appearance. That seemed like a whole lot of heavy discourse before 8 a.m. We hadn’t even finished our bananas yet.

Surprised Frack