children, gratitude, happiness, life in pictures, mommyhood, motherhood, parenting

Happy Birthday, T.Puzzle

T.Puzzle turns four today!

My baby is now officially in big boy territory.  Let’s hope like his brother before him, this increases his awesomeness tenfold.  Let’s leave the terrible ones, twos and threes behind us forever.

The birth of a child is always a vivid memory.  T.Puzzle’s stands out because I went into labor (after a solid month of miserably contracting for no reason) on the night of our third wedding anniversary.  I was in complete denial.  I can even remember the clothes I was wearing in great detail.  That’s mainly because I was so huge (T.Puzzle ended up being a healthy 9lb 7oz), I only had one semi-dressy maternity outfit that fit me reasonably well.  Black pants, with a huge amount of stretch no less, and a long-sleeved black tunic with red and white dots to top off this stylish ensemble. Pregnancy is certainly not about the fashion.

When I realized that the Braxton Hicks I was having were actually closer to the real deal, we went to the hospital where I continued to deny I was in labor.  I even got to watch an episode of Sex and the City on TBS as we waited to see if I dilated more.

Eventually, I couldn’t deny it any longer.  T.Puzzle came into this world and screamed louder than any newborn I have ever known.  I remember thinking, ‘baby, you’re suppose to be my easy one,’ and this only seemed to increase his volume.

Easy or not, he is the best second kid anyone could hope for.

Happy  birthday, T.Puzzle.  I love you!

children, grief, kids, life in pictures, loss of parent, marriage, mommyhood, motherhood, parenting, self-discovery

Love & Birthdays


Happy 6th birthday, Full Speed!


I am having many mixed feelings about Full Speed’s sixth birthday today.  I am excited for him and happy his remarkable growth and change are being marked in such a celebratory way.  The challenge is not having my Mom here to help me celebrate or to share in all the wonderful milestones Full Speed has achieved in the past year.

It was hard enough that she wasn’t here to offer support and guidance when he started kindergarten.  Now, with each passing year, Full Speed is growing into who he is meant to be and she won’t be able to see it.   I wish she could because this kid is only getting better with age.

As the distance grows from the last point in which my Mom was in my life, it is ever more shocking to my system that she really isn’t coming back.

I’d also like to apologize to Mad Dog for my extra crazy, unpredictible moods as of late.  I am in the last stages of processing my Mom’s absence and while I will never fully let her go, I will move forward in a more even-handed manner.  I promise.

All I can do is my absolute best.  I will celebrate the good times in my present and honor the sadness as it floats up from my past.

I am grateful for the time that I had with my Mom.  I believe the joy I have managed to create in my own little corner of the world is possible through her choices and example.   I watched and I learned.  I made some different choices of my own.  Most importantly, I was loved.

Thanks, Mom.

children, gratitude, happiness, mommyhood

Touchdown! (Part Two)

Mad Dog not only made me breakfast and cleaned up the kitchen, he has offered to take the boys to Box Seats again this afternoon.

I would write more but it’s jig dancing time again. I’m opting for a combination of Beyonce’s ‘Single Ladies’ choreography with some old school Madonna ‘Holiday’ dance moves.

Come together in every nation, it’s time for a celebration!

children, gratitude, happiness, kids, mommyhood

Frosted Cupcakes (Almost)

Today is an exciting celebratory and busy, busy day. It is Mad Dog’s and my sixth anniversary and we are celebrating T.Puzzle’s third birthday. His birthday is technically the day after our anniversary but we need to take advantage of his aunt and cousins being here. When I went in to get him up this morning I said, “Who is celebrating their birthday today?”

T.Puzzle replied, “Thomas!” I didn’t have the heart to tell him that he isn’t in fact, a tank engine.

I would write more but my guilt of being a Mom of a kid with a food allergy is not affording me any extra time. T.Puzzle is allergic to eggs so I have spent my morning making dozens of eggless cupcakes (I want him to have a bunch to take to school tomorrow on his actual birthday). They still needed to be frosted and sprinkled and frankly, I don’t want to spend the remainder of my sister’s visit attached to the computer or stuck in the kitchen. I also need to put my sister to work. Hope she’s a good cupcake froster!