children, eyesight, gratitude, happiness, health, humor, life in pictures, mommyhood, motherhood, parenting


boys play matchbox cars to pass the time at the ophthalmologist's

We are seated in the tiny eye exam room.  I am so beyond stressed that I actually feel kind of calm.

These visits to the pediatric ophthalmologist are not without uncertainty.

Will Full Speed test well?

Is T.Puzzle in a cooperative mood?

I try to convince myself it’s no big deal.  I mean only the future of my children’s vision is at stake here.

We wait for the eye doctor.

She breezes into the room with grace and confidence.

She clearly adores my boys.

This helps.

Full Speed is an unexpected rock star of vision testing.

He tests 20/40 in his right eye and 20/30 in his left.

I almost faint.

He then proceeds to read a line of print so teeny-tiny, I’m positive that only someone with superhuman eyesight could read it (no, it’s not that I’m old in the least and had to squint to read the line myself).

I almost faint again.

I get goosebumps on top of my goosebumps.  My heart fills with immeasurable gratitude.

It hardly phases me that T.Puzzle is mostly uncooperative.  He holds steady at 20/50 and 20/70.

I’ll take it.

During this arduous process of eye surgeries, doctor’s appointments and visits to the ophthalmologist, I have learned that I cannot control the level of vision that each of my boys will attain.

All I can control is how I feel about it.

And today for the first time in my life, I feel absolutely amazing about their vision.

This is one of the best days ever.

children, health


Full Speed’s frames are irreparable. New ones have been ordered and we are back to waiting. He should have his new glasses by the time he leaves for college (hopefully).

And, I took T.Puzzle to the doc to have that bulge on the side of his neck evaluated. I tried to let it go but that thing kept staring at me.

I had to take both boys so you know it was absolute insanity. There were karate moves, climbing contests and fights over the scale to see who weighed the most (Full Speed did but only by seven pounds).

The doctor was kind and efficient, not to mention extraordinarily patient. My heart stuck in my throat as I watchfully observed him examine other regions of little T.Puzzle’s body for signs of inflammation. It took maybe thirty seconds but felt like a lifetime.

T.Puzzle got the all clear for now. I was so relieved I wanted to hug the doctor. Sure, his nodes are inflammed and swollen all up and down his neck but since that’s all the doctor could find, that’s normal for now.  T.Puzzle tested negative for strep and we were sent on our way. All I have to do is keep an eye on the node (which could stay that way indefinitely), and if I don’t see any changes like in skin color and size, he should be fine.

I do what I can to keep my boys healthy and then I have to let go of the things I cannot control. This is my challenge. This is motherhood.