children, gratitude, happiness, humor, kids, life in pictures, mommyhood, motherhood, parenting, self-discovery, self-image/self-acceptance

Perfect

When Mad Dog is out of town for work, I decide this is the time in which not only do I have to be supermom, but I have to do it perfectly.  My belief system, as crazy as it sounds, deems it necessary that if I can keep my boys happy and smiling while Mad Dog is away, then I must be doing my ‘job’ right.

Let me say it right now.  This is insane.

So what if Full Speed is angry I made him wear a jacket to school this morning (it was cold, yes, 60 degrees in Florida is considered cold)?  So what if T.Puzzle pouts because I didn’t have his favorite kind of pancake readily available for breakfast (Confetti Pancakes by Aunt Jemima in case you are wondering)?  Oh, and let’s not forget my minor meltdown because Full Speed’s new teacher scheduled an open house with only three days notice.  It took a phone call to my sister who thankfully answered to tell me what to do.  It was so simple.  Skip karate, have Mad Dog’s Dad watch the boys and go to the open house alone.  Brilliant.  Absolutely brilliant.

Why didn’t I see this simple solution?  Because my inner perfect Mommy critic told me I needed to take my boys to karate like I promised Mad Dog.  He didn’t know there was an open house when he left and neither did I. For some reason, I couldn’t deviate from my original plan.  My sister gave me the permission I needed so I could.

Thank goodness my sister was a voice of calm reason.  I guess that’s why if you are lucky enough to have one, you are infinitely blessed because they can come through for you in the most unexpected and very appreciated ways.

Maybe I can let my inner critic soften a little bit or at least offer her a shot of tequila (I mean loosen up, girl!), and stop looking at how I am falling short of perfection.  I need to flip my belief system upside down.

How about all the times Full Speed and T.Puzzle shared a genuine giggle with me while Mad Dog is away?  Or how ‘Dust Buster Tag’ is their new favorite pasttime (my floors are cleaner for it)?  Or how about the basic fact that they are clothed, fed, bathed and quite simply loved (even when they are angry and/or pouting)?

Love is patient, love is kind…, it’s anything you want it to be except perfect.

children, gratitude, grief, happiness, loss of parent, mommyhood, motherhood, parenting

Slam Dunk

Hoosiers
Image via Wikipedia

The goal in writing this blog is to give some much needed observatory distance from the chaos that is my every day life.  It helps if I take a moment to reflect on the day’s events and allows me to be a more accepting person/Mom.  I have grown leaps and bounds in acceptance but there are still times when I find myself holding my breath and wishing that my boys were a tad bit calmer than they actually are.

It just ain’t so.

I had high expectations for our family movie night viewing of ‘Hoosiers‘.  While I am at heart a true girlie girl, I appreciate good sports and I adore a good sports movie.  This particular movie is very special to me.  I vividly remember going with my Mom to see it and we bonded tremendously over the nail-biting basketball sequences and rooting for the underdog.  I truly felt like my mother’s daughter after this experience.  She, the lover of all things basketball, realized that maybe I wasn’t only all about lip-gloss and hairspray.

I prepared myself that the boys would lose interest in about the first five minutes of the movie.  Despite this mental preparation I couldn’t help but ‘wish’ that they would sit quietly for its duration and maybe even love it a little, too.

Thankfully, it exceeded my expectations.  Granted, T.Puzzle fell asleep because the movie had a late start, but Full Speed was riveted.

T.Puzzle can't run with the big dogs and falls asleep before Hoosier's sectionals. No worries, we own the movie little guy.

Maybe there’s more to each of us than we realize.

If we learn to let go of what we think people should be, they might just surprise us and be exactly who we need.

And learning this is the slam-dunk of motherhood.

children, mommyhood

So, I Did

Mad Dog is away for the week for a training and he left the boys “in charge” (this pretense drives me absolutely bananas by the way).  Full Speed takes this very seriously. Before he left for school he gave me a run-down of his expectations for me:

1. Make sure no strangers come into the house while he is at school.
2. Keep the door to his room closed so it stays ‘safe’.
3. Make sure no harm befalls our television.
4. Keep little T.Puzzle away from all his stuff. (I told him this would be my easiest task because T.Puzzle would be at school just like him; he was visibly relieved).

When he returned home he had a moment of unexpected empathy for me. “Mom, how was your day today?” he asked. I was so happy that he was actually interested in what I did. Most people aren’t that concerned about what a stay-at-home-Mom does with her day. I started to tell him and then I realized he wasn’t really asking about my day. He was asking if his expectations as head of the house had been fulfilled.

I told him that no one came in the house, his door stayed shut, the television was in one piece AND T.Puzzle didn’t touch anything.

“Good job, Mom. Now, give me a high-five.”

So, I did.