humor, motherhood

Victory

Full Speed clunked his way through the school library doors.  The past couple days tested him.  A cold slowed his usual enthusiasm for life and by the looks of him, I knew his day drained what little energy he had left.  He sat in silence while I finished up my volunteer tasks.  Once T.Puzzle arrived, we made our way to the car.

I asked Full Speed point-blank, “What did you have for lunch?”

He said, “Nothing.”

Nothing!  Alarm bells rang loud and clear in my head.  He passed on breakfast and instead of forcing the issue, I made him promise to eat something at lunch.

Once lunchtime arrived, his appetite would reappear.  I counted on that and said as much to him.

To hear him say he ate nothing all day seemed unacceptable.

“You.  Are eating dinner.  No negotiation.  Understand me?” I said.

He nodded in defeat.

Later, at the dinner table as T.Puzzle described his luncheon with the principal (as an honor, not a punishment, thank goodness!), something in the way Full Speed’s eyes twinkled, made me question if he skipped lunch.

“Full Speed, did you really not eat lunch?” I said.

Silence.

“Full Speed?”

No answer.

“Alright, I guess I’ll just look it up on your lunch account and find out for myself.”

“Yes!  I had lunch!  Okay?” he said.

“Why would you lie about that?” I said.

“Because then I would have to admit you were right.  My appetite did come back and I was hungry.  I already had two days of feeling sick.  I couldn’t admit that my mom was right and I was wrong on top of that!”

Like a lunch after hours of not eating, victory never tasted so sweet.

 

Victory

inspiration, motherhood

I Remember You

IMG_0999My phone was switched to silent.  As I clacked away at my computer, I happened to glance in its direction right when a call came in.

I answered immediately and heard the phrase every moms dreads:

“Hello, this is the Clinic….”

Turns out, T.Puzzle had chills, a fever and a headache.

I grabbed my keys and was out the door.

Normally, in this situation, my life freezes in place.  Any plans are immediately tossed aside.

This is no longer true.

Even though T.Puzzle came home early AND missed the next day of school, I attended my creative writing class (held at night), did yoga and went to a hair appointment.

It was as if I was a real human being living an actual life.

If you are a mom and feel complete overwhelm at the loss of your freedom, I am here to tell you it does return.

Until then, be kind to yourself and please, ask for help.

I haven’t forgotten that you were a person before you had children.

Do your best to hold on to her.

She’s worth the wait.

ShortQuotesYouMatterQuotesAmigo

humor, kids, motherhood

There’s a Reason Drama Rhymes with Mama

I am kind of a mess right now.  If you ran into me on the street, I still appear normal on the outside, but inside me swims the anxiety and tension of moving my family to a new state.  This is all a normal part of the experience.

What isn’t normal is that my boys are not really freaking out.  I mean, aren’t they supposed to be freaking out?

Here’s a recent conversation I had with them:

“Are you nervous about going to a new school?” I said.

Both said, “No.”

“Are you worried you won’t make new friends?” I said.

Both said, “No.”

“Are you concerned that you won’t be academically prepared when school starts?”

Both said, “No.”

Can you spot the pattern here?

Maybe instead I should ask, “Are you worried your mom is going to ask you so many questions about whether or not you are worried that you may tune her out completely?”

(crickets chirping)

Thank you to the stars above for giving me two, level-headed sons that tolerate my dramatic inquiries and love me anyway.

Fewer questions equal less drama.

No guarantees.

 

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humor, motherhood

When Left to Their Own Devices…

T.Puzzle needed me to sign a paper in his folder.  I use the word ‘folder’ loosely here.  While my occupations as a stay-at-home-mom and writer/dreamer/blogger have their busy work, I often have very little need for folders.  Therefore, when I saw T.Puzzle’s ‘folder’, I wasn’t exactly sure what I was seeing:

Apparently he ‘stores’ it at the bottom of his backpack.

This may be where all paper-based products go to die.

Speaking of dying, this segues nicely into our little family weekend adventure.  I have to preface this by saying that of my three boys, Mad Dog normally requires the least amount of supervision.  I may have to change this policy to preserve his safety.

On Friday, Mad Dog had a routine root canal.  He seemed to have the pain mostly managed and overall, had everything ‘under control’.

Shortly after when he took the allotted four ibupofren to manage pain, he realized he accidentally ingested four of his antibiotic pills instead.

He should have taken 300mgs, but decided to go all out with 1200mgs.

To save you time, here is what Google said:

1200mgs is the very top of what a doctor would prescribe and only in a dire, life-threatening bacterial infection kind of way.  It said nothing about ingesting the 1200mgs as a way to threaten your own life in a general, absent-minded way.

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Taking too many antibiotics?

Thankfully, Mad Dog made it safely through the night.  Unfortunately, he nows move to the top of the list as being the most supervised of my three boys.

 

 

 

family, humor, kids, motherhood

What’s For Dinner?

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I am taking this opportunity to announce my plans to officially change my name to:

What’s For Dinner

Why you may ask?

This is because I have been asked this question so many times a new neural pathway has formed in my brain convincing me that this, in fact, must be my name.

News flash:

It isn’t.

The point I’m making is that a sure-fire way to get on my bad side is to ask me:

‘What’s for dinner?’

It isn’t that I’m opposed to the question in a general sense, but if that is the question you lead with 999 times out of a thousand, I’m not keen to respond in a pleasant manner.  At least lead in with a ‘How was your day?’ or ‘Your yoga pants are particularly stylish today’.

Therefore, after a long night up with a dog with seemingly endless diarrhea (it all came out fine in the end), I explained to T.Puzzle over his after school snack I may have a short fuse as the evening progressed.

“So, I shouldn’t ask you what’s for dinner?”

And so he lived to see another day.