children, gratitude, humor, kids, motherhood, parenting

The Goal is LOVE (Happy New Year)

When I began this blog, I didn’t really have any big goals.  I was still grieving the profound loss of my mom, which does and doesn’t get easier, and coping with raising two rambunctious boys.  I started writesforallmommies on a whim and it became a great coping mechanism for me.  It allowed me to connect with others in a way that my very introverted personality sometimes doesn’t allow.

Through the years, I have had posts that click with a reader, friend or relative.  That is the best feeling in the world.  To know that something I wrote resonated and hopefully made them feel less alone.  Let’s be honest, raising children (or life in general) can be very isolating.  We feel judged as much as we judge.  We question ourselves as much as we question others.  We put on a brave front that we know what we are doing, when in fact, we know very little about how our actions will impact the future.  It is frightening and exhilarating and mystifying and lovely all at once.

I recently received an email from a mom thanking me for my support during her daughter’s recent diagnosis of ectopia lentis. This is the same, genetic eye disorder both of my boys have. It is so rare, that it is difficult to find adequate resources on-line or anywhere at all for that matter. This mom is one of three that has contacted me through writesforallmommies.com concerning this matter.

To be able to help these moms cope with the overwhelming feelings that came with this bizarre sounding disorder has been one of the greatest rewards of writing this blog.  I share this with you because if you are going through a particularly rough patch right now, know that it is preparing you to be of service to someone else.  My boys were undiagnosed for a long, long time and not knowing anyone who had gone through the same experience was gut-wrenching.  I know I didn’t completely prevent the feelings of despair for these women, but I eased the way and gave them hope.  My boys are living proof that vision does not define them.  They are awesome, adaptive and remarkable.  No matter what happens with their vision down the road, they will remain awesome, adaptive and remarkable.

You are all those and more, dear reader.

Happy New Year!

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children, humor, kids, motherhood, parenting

Free Time

Today is doomsday.  This is my babysitter’s last day to help out during the week.  I told her to have a ‘free day’ with the boys (which full disclosure, she actually wanted very much).  That means she picked both boys up from school.  That means I have several hours of free time.  Let me repeat that, I have several hours of free time.  A friend asked me what I was going to do.  I didn’t have the foggiest idea.  Oh sure, I know how to kill a few hours with errands or the occasional  appointment.  Several hours, well, that’s a whole different league.  It’s a liberating feeling this free time to be spent alone.  It also is kind of sad that I had to think very hard about what to do with it.  This is what I came up with in no particular order: clothes shopping for myself (zero interruptions…it was divine), snack at Panera to do some writing including this blog post (I love, love, love to write) and to cap the night off, dinner with some girlfriends.

Who am I without my children to define my life or my time?  Turns out I’m exactly the same.  Same hair, same perspective and same joys and sorrows. The only difference is this quiet bubble that surrounds me wherever I go today.

I am certainly more of an observer of life than a participator.  I leave full on life participation to the hands of my boys.  Better enjoy the quiet while I can…